Why can’t everything just be normal for once??

So this is my first deep blog post woooo. 

So at lunch (which was half an hour ago), Tiffany and I saw Bella writing things like “everyone fucking hates you” and stuff on a piece of paper and then after lunch we all went into the toilets and talked and cried and stuff, and we tried to get Bella to go to the nurse but she didnt. So then I stayed in the toilet with Tiffany and hugged her and we talked about Bella, and then she said that she’d go to the nurse because she didn’t want to go to class. So then we went our separate ways, then about 15 minutes in Chem (I’d already arrived 10 minutes late), I saw Tiffany going into the toilets, because my Chem class has a window that goes out to where the toilets are). Obviously, this set off warning bells in my head, and in the end I told my teacher I was going to the toilets, so I went and saw her. I waited for a bit (shaking and feeling sick the whole time), and eventually she came out of the cubicle. She saw me there and seemed surprised, and said “What are you doing here?”, and I said that I had seen her going into the toilets and had freaked out, because toilets generally mean crying and/or cutting/suicide. Which are bad, obviously. But she said that she only went there because the nurse was closed and she needed somewhere else to go besides class, and then she hugged me and felt me shaking, and I guess it was then that she realised just how worried I was about her. Because the school knows that I was depressed and cutting and stuff, they have this rule that I can only be out of class for 10 minutes. So I had to leave after a bit, and she told me not to worry about her, but I can’t help it. I still feel, sick, and I’m still shaking. And she still hasn’t come out of the toilets... it’s been 20 minutes since I left her. I hope she's OK.